Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Restaurant Review Guidelines

Sometimes I like to eat in restaurants. I'll bet you do, too.

Usually the restaurants I visit are in Maine, but sometimes I go other places. Maybe you will go to some of the same places, and then get hungry. To assist you in finding vegan-friendly restaurants, I have devised a sophisticated legume-based rating system. Here are the guidelines:

one chickpea
Vegan options are pitiful or non-existent. There is nothing for you but a side salad and french fries.
Example: Bugaboo Creek Steakhouse. The one time I was unfortunate enough to have to eat here I had a dry baked potato with salt and ketchup.

two chickpeas
Vegan options are limited and show no imagination. You can choose between a soggy veggie burger and spaghetti.
Example: Gritty McDuff's. How about a wet mushroom sandwich?

three chickpeas
A creative selection of vegan entrees that goes beyond the standards and allows you think about what you would actually like to eat, not just what's vegan.
Example: the defunct Barking Cat Cafe. "You mean I can have a tofu scramble, or oatmeal, or vegan pancakes?"

four chickpeas
The menu is almost entirely vegan. Your mind is blown. You hyperventilate because you're not used to having so many choices.
Example: Green Elephant. Amazing. Can I move in?

Restaurant reviews to follow!


  1. I love Green Elephant too! I am in Boston where we have a *few* more vegan restaurants than Maine but I swear Green Elephant is way better than any of the places we have here!

  2. This is such a cute rating system! I love it.


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